People on the Autism Spectrum are substantially more likely to consider suicide and also to do it (from memory it is 6x more and 2x more).
This makes sense when you consider my 4 word summary of people with Asperger’s – Think More, Feel More.
We typically over-think everything, and are a lot more emotional. Being withdrawn and “lacking empathy” are actually coping mechanisms, to deal with the overload of feelings. If I accidentally stood on an ant, I am sure I would literally cry, if I hadn’t spent my whole life adjusting my behaviour to be more normal.
When I was younger I contemplated it in theory many times, but when I attempted it, I surprised myself. It kinda came out of nowhere, but was clearly from an accumulation of desperate loneliness, alienation and being in a situation I didn’t have the skills to cope with.
It was also, perhaps, the best thing I ever failed. Because I also “think more”, suicide is the most irrational thing imaginable. It has ever since been something that is stupid to even contemplate. And I have loved being alive more because of it.
- You only live once (probably)
- Any form of existence is better than nothing (perhaps)
- But here’s the kicker – if you are so low you want to end things, that is most likely the worst things will ever get. Which means your future must be better. Which means the whole rest of your life could be an existence where you don’t think that way again.
I have since known numerous suicidal people, and been in situations where I was involved as someone they could talk to. I am no expert, have no training, have read no books on the topic – but I think I have been helpful (they are all still alive).
I think my approach comes from being on the spectrum – I talk logic to them. I don’t discuss the situation they are in, or family, or the past, or how it is selfish. They are all on the emotional side of things that got them there. I just explain that it is a stupid, illogical thing to do, especially as I know from experience that things will definitely get better. I mention all the nice possibilities in their future they will never get to have. And I tell them that it is their choice, but doing it would be nonsensical. I make a point of saying it is a choice, and they get to decide. I figure that is different to their state of mind which is suggesting there is no choice, that there is only one way out.
I have known people who have killed themselves. I just never got to discuss it with them. I think that’s my point. Be the person they will want to talk to.